I Teach…

This week, we are going to look at a major problem. The issues that arise between businesses and clients that damage business relationships are one of the biggest problems you will face as you build your business. This blog identifies all the major issues—and should help you fix them. There is no reason to have a poor rapport between yourself and your clients! If you do, let’s fix it!

Not Listening

This is one of the most obvious signs of poor communication in every business relationship. Someone who always cuts off their client every time they speak can send a wrong message to that person; for example, that their opinion and their thoughts are insignificant. Try to improve your listening skills and always try to understand what your client is telling you. This is one of the best ways to prevent any misunderstanding.

Being Passive Aggressive

Passive aggressiveness is one of the most dangerous forms of communication. By using it, you can put the other person on the defensive, and in the long term, this type of behavior can affect the stability of your relationship.

Losing Your Temper Very Easily

If you have anger issues, and if you easily lose your temper, then you might have communication problems, too. Anger will not allow you to express yourself rationally, and your behavior may hurt your client’s feelings or cause them to get angry in return. Despite this, everyone is accountable for their actions and for their reactions. If you remain calm during an argument, you can discuss things rationally to sort things out and not risk damaging the relationship.

No Nagging

Yes, nagging is indeed a sign of poor communication in your business relationship.

If you constantly nag, repeating the same demands over and over, you are not communicating efficiently, and the other person will not receive the message you are trying to send. Learn straightforward communication techniques that allow the problem to be addressed productively.

Ignoring That Person

Ignoring your client is not a way to improve the communication in your relationship. Not talking to your client when you are upset over something they did is never a good solution if you want to solve the problem. Ignoring your client will only cause more problems in your relationship, and you will only sabotage yourself and your business.

Shouting, Screaming and Using Poor Language

Even if you’re upset, this doesn’t give you the right to offend or to hurt someone, especially in a professional environment. Don’t use profanities, and be respectful!

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I Speak…

sleepMany studies have suggested that repetition can have a positive effect on someone’s agreement with an argument. It may be important for you to learn the art of repetition—because like any skill it can be done right, but it can also be done wrong. If you are going to repeat yourself to make your point, you have to learn how to pose your repetition to create an impact. Let’s see how you can make it work…

Change the Way You Say It!

Although repetition can be successful as a persuasion strategy, subtlety can be as important as the frequency and intensity of the message. Rather than repeating the same words and phrasing throughout the course of an argument, finding more than one way to make the same argument repeatedly can be a more effective approach. The reader or listener is likely to respond more positively to the same argument stated several ways rather than having the same message shoved down his throat over and over.

How Often Do You Do It?

The use of repetition in a persuasive argument can be effective if the argument is constructed in such a way that the repetition is spread out over a period of time. The use of repetition over the long course of an argument, written or spoken, creates a greater familiarity with the message and leads to gradual agreement if the intensity of repetition is gradual itself. Too much repetition in a short span of time or space can actually defeat the very purpose of gradual acceptance by creating a stronger aversion to the argument. All repetition should be carefully spaced at equal or similar intervals throughout the argument.

How Much Do You Do It?

In speeches or other spoken arguments that are highly emotional in nature, frequent repetition of key emotionally charged phrases can be effective. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have a Dream Speech” often is cited as one of the primary examples of the success of such repetition. However, it may be effective in messages of this nature only because of the already emotional nature of the issue. Such techniques in sales and marketing may have the opposite effect — turning off the consumer — if not approached carefully.

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I Speak…

once uponSometimes, even the best public speakers or performers find themselves in the worst possible position. They find themselves failing in front of an expectant audience. This blog post is all about the disasters that can befall a public speaker. Let’s hope these things never happen to you.

Losing Your Mind

At some point in time, you’re going to have a senior moment.  It happens to everyone. As our lives move faster and faster, it’s normal that our brains will occasionally get left behind.  What do you do?  The answer is: Wait.  It will seem like forever to you, but it will be only a few seconds in real time.  So wait it out.  The words will come to you.  Your brain will catch up with your mouth.  Just give it time. Sometimes you just need to be calm, kick back, and smile.

Unhappily Being Heckled

This happens more often than you might think. Some people really enjoy making themselves heard. The natural instinct is to avoid a heckler because the whole experience is unpleasant.  But fight the instinct on this one and do the counter-intuitive thing—stand up to the heckler.

Bad, Bad Technology

If you use technology, it will crash.  Seriously. At some point, it will crash. The answer is to have a version of your presentation ready to go – always – that doesn’t depend on technology.  Be prepared to tell good stories without those colorful slides.  Have a Plan B!

Greedy Speakers

Just as you have a non-tech version of your talk ready to go, you should also have a short version ready to go for the inevitable time when the speaker before you simply won’t stop talking.  That allows you to look like a hero for getting the agenda back on track.  In extraordinary circumstances, you can take your time out of the next part of the agenda, but get the conference organizer both to agree to it and announce it.  Otherwise, it’s your fault, and everyone will hate you for keeping them from their lunch. Don’t continue the greedy behavior of the speaker in front of you—change direction and win.

Audience Expectations

Sometimes, you will find yourself in front of an audience smaller than you expected. Be warm and thank them all for coming—then dive in with all your might. If you get a bigger crowd than you expected, try to get people seated as comfortably as possible and then keep eye contact with as many people as you can. If you are faced with a lot of noise—don’t worry—wait until they quiet down and start with a smile.

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I Teach…

once uponThere are many reasons to seek out a life coach—but before you do, you should know a few facts about life coaching. Many people see it as an opportunity to go through therapy without going to see a therapist; others see it as the answer to all their problems—but there are certain realties you have to realize. Let’s take a look at them…

Focus – Life Coaching Allows You to Focus on Yourself

Many people often leave themselves behind. Life coaching actually puts you first, for perhaps the first time.  Life coaching takes the necessary time with you to discover your true values, goals, and talents, and will help you create a plan to fulfilling them. After all, YOU are important! Repeat that to yourself now—YOU ARE IMPORTANT!

Order – Life Coaching Gives You the Opportunity to Get Your Life in Order

In life coaching, you immediately take action. You stop being a person living on the sidelines, letting your life pass you by. A good life coach helps you understand yourself better and helps you to live a life aligned with your morals, values, and core beliefs.  It is NOT long-term psychotherapy. With support and encouragement, YOU are urged to sit in the driver’s seat in your own life. With your coach as your strongest advocate, YOU decide when you have met your goals. Try it!

Professional – Life Coaching Is Unbiased

When you have a life coach, you get to talk through your struggles with someone who is not going to interrupt you or push you towards what they think you should do. A great life coach would never make judgments or criticize your choices, but instead offers suggestions and give you the space and time to think through your challenges and options. Of course, everything you say to your coach will be kept in total confidence. It’s all about you.

Therapy – Life Coaching Is Not Therapy

Life coaching is never about treating mental illness and working through deeply rooted psychological issues. You should seek professional help in those situations. Therapy is great for people with psychological problems that require intervention with a mental health specialist. Life coaching is an empowering process for normal, healthy people to get help making their lives better, happier, and more fulfilled.

Fun – Yes, Life Coaching Can Be Fun

Expect to laugh a lot during your coaching sessions! Sometimes making change can be more than a little scary, but coaching is actually fun and empowering. It feels great to get things out in the open – so you can get clarity and take action.

Accountability- Life Coaches Hold You Responsible for Yourself

If you’re feeling negative and lacking in motivation, your coach will help you challenge limiting assumptions and beliefs you may have about yourself and the situations you find yourself in.  He or she will help you work through the issues that are preventing you from moving forward and, above all, keep you focused on your goals!

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I Speak…

sleepAre you failing to keep your audience interested when you speak? Are you scratching your head and wondering why you are losing them halfway through? These are my tips to help you keep your audience engaged, interested and interactive.

Don’t Become Boring

This is crucial. The most effective way of keeping your audience’s attention is not to go on for too long. Some of the worst experiences speakers have related derived from their staying on stage too long and having their audiences leave before the end. Don’t fall into this trap—your family might like you to talk through dinner—but paying audiences don’t.

What Is Your Audience Looking For?

You may think this is pretty obvious and that you’d never make this mistake. But I see many otherwise intelligent people talk about what they’re interested in rather than what the audience is interested in.

If you’re speaking at a conference, people come to your session because of the synopsis – that’s what they’re interested in. Don’t change it just because it suits you. Many years ago, I saw one the most successful professional speakers make this same mistake. His session was advertised as being about mail marketing. But he had become interesting in the art of telesales. When he asked how many people in the audience had any interest in the subject, about five people out of three hundred put their hands up. You’d think he’d take the hint, but he continued to keep telling us all about the fine art of telesales. Don’t make the same mistake—keep to what the audience wants.

Start with a Reason to Listen

Before each of the presentations skills courses we run, you may want to ask each attendee to fill in an online questionnaire. The most critical question is to ask them if they are interested in the subject you are going to talk about.

If your audience doesn’t have an obvious reason to be interested, tell them why they should bother listening to you talking about this subject. This can be very challenging. I’ve had email discussions with a number of readers who present on topics such as health and safety issues or environmental regulations. The audience has to be there, but they have no intrinsic interest in the topic. The solution is to tell them why they should care. And if you can’t find a reason why they should listen – don’t give the presentation.

Make Change—Make Happy

We notice change. You notice the hum of the drier when it comes on and when it goes off – but not in between. You can use this natural human propensity to retrieve your audience’s attention. Don’t be afraid to change the pace of your presentation, bring video into the conversation or stimulate your audience with a question or two.

Tell Stories

Every presentation expert extolls the power of stories, from Dr. Robert H. Schuller to Steve Harrison. There’s evidence that people are hard-wired to listen to stories. The moment a story starts, your audience will perk up. Your stories should, of course, reinforce the point you’re making. Take a look at your presentation from the point of view of stories. Are they spread throughout your presentation – or bunched together? Spread them out for best effect.

Take a Break

Build in frequent breaks, but if you see people starting to flag in their attention, suggest a quick break for 1-2 minutes where people can refresh their drinks and have a walk around. Moving is the most effective way of reviving people at risk of dozing off. Seriously. You will have them back in better shape than they were before they left.

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Learn The True Power of #Hashtags This Warrior Wednesday!

once uponTo be a true entrepreneur, you have to keep yourself ahead of the trends, and that’s part of what our Warrior Wednesday is about. We want to inspire you to achieve the very best you can, and we want to give you many of the tools that you will need to get there. This week, I’d like for us to continue looking at #hashtags. In recent years, the #hashtag has become important to marketers at every stage. Some of the biggest companies in the world have used #hashtags to the greatest effect on #Twitter.

Let’s see how they did it…

#TweetFromTheSeat—Charmin

Just to prove that even a mundane company like Charmin can compete—we are going to start this list with one of their most successful campaigns. This is a prime example of a company really getting to grips with their product—and it was surprising to see such innovation from a toilet paper manufacturer like Charmin. The tissue company broke out of its ‘boring’ niche with the campaign #TweetFromTheSeat, which had people use that hashtag when they were, well… most likely to use it.

#PutACanOnIt—Red Bull

Recently popular drink company Red Bull came away with the prestigious “Best Use of a Hashtag” Shorty Award with its #PutACanOnIt campaign. Though the hashtag was created by Red Bull, it was inspired by a photo the company found on Twitter wherein the photographer is seen holding a Red Bull can above a Mini Cooper to make it look as though it was a trademarked Red Bull car.

#OreoHorrorStories—Oreo

Oreo, a company notorious for a fantastic social media presence, really outdid itself when it created one of the most fun Halloween hashtags of all time. The cookie company created quick, Oreo-themed parodies of popular horror films. This campaign helped the company maintain their position with today’s buyers.

#ShareaCoke—Coca Cola

Coca Cola has had some seriously amazing marketing initiatives over the years. From the classic “I’d Like to Buy the World a Coke”—all the way through to the Twitter age. One of the best examples of their advertising genius in the modern world is the unique way they rigged their vending machines to interact with customers.

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Publishing Your Book: Websites That Help Promote Books: Part Ten

once uponAfter writing a book, many people want to know how one goes about publishing a book. A well-known author once said recently that “it’s no great feat to get one’s book published—it’s no great mountain to climb.” He is right, but his opinion is subjective. To you, reading this blog, it is a huge mountain to climb to get your book published. There are many paths you can take up that mountain, but it is still a huge feat.

This week, I would like to look at some of the places you can list your book for free to get noticed. These five sites have been proven to be some of the most effective free promotion in the book world. But even with these sites there are some ups and downs. The downside is that you will still be fighting for places on these sites with thousands of other authors. The upside is that once you get listed on these sites they may well help you create sales.

All of these sites give your book potential—the potential to get a huge dose of publicity and a run of strong paid sales. These paid sales will drive your rankings and will turn into more sales. People always say that the free stuff isn’t worth it—but sometimes it is.

Addicted to eBooks

This website is perfect for readers who love cheaper books. The website also allows authors to rate some of the content of their book. If you want to know the level of sexual, violent or rude content before you buy a book, this site will appeal to you. I’m excited that authors can now rate their books for the readers.

Author Marketing Club

One of the best resources for writers. You don’t have to chase around the internet trying to find sites to submit to. You can just go to the Author Marketing Club and see which sites are available to use.

Books on the Knob

Bargain reads, free ebooks and book reviews for the Amazon Kindle, nook, Kobo, Sony and other ereaders, Kindle Fire, nookColor, Kobo Vox, and other tablets, along with some games and other stuff. A useful site for authors to know about.

Digital Book Today

Includes both free and paid options for writers looking to promote. A great place to promote your book, and a place that you may have to work to get into—but once you are, you’ll reap the rewards.

eBooks Habit

Each day, this site brings you 20-30 great ebooks that are free at the time of posting, as well as some bargain ebooks with reduced prices. If you have a promotion going on—a free giveaway, etc.—then this may be the site for you.

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Let Your Worries Go with the Wind on Warrior Wednesday…

fear11“Let it all go and just look to achieve… look be at peace with yourself, make your warrior Wednesday the best day of your week!”

Living in the modern world isn’t easy. Your whole life may feel like it is exploding around you on a daily basis. The constant demands on your time, energy and finances can be more than you can bear. Obstacles, roadblocks, arguments, problems and people are all things that lead to stress. This week, I want to talk about ways to relieve yourself of these everyday stresses that will stop you from achieving your dreams.  Kick back, forget about the world and its problems, and indulge in the things you love.

Become Addicted to Reading

Picking up a book allows you to get away — without even leaving your room. Take this time to learn about any topic you wish, including whatever it is that’s causing your current stress. You can gain insight, advice and peace of mind by reading. If you need some good suggestions, check out this list.

Write Off Your Stress

Writing is something that many of us don’t do on a daily basis anymore. Yet many people believe that it’s one of the most powerful exercises to success.  Experts believe that writing can help you better understand any dilemma or situation. Why don’t you pick up a diary and start jotting down your problems? You may find that the answers come to you easier with the problem on paper.

Exercise Yourself to Health

You’ve probably been told this a thousand times. Exercise is a good way to relieve stress. You can literally lose yourself in something so consuming. Time can fly when you are at the gym. From working moms to billionaires, the gym has been a proven stress reliever for everyone.

Relaxation and Meditation

One of the most amazing ways to destress is to meditate. You can remove yourself from everything going on around you and truly relax. Meditation has been proven to help remove stress, focus your mind and to help you see clearly. Give it a try!

Dump Technology

Every single person on this planet seems to be obsessed with their email, Facebook, Twitter, and the internet. It’s unlikely that you’ll be able to really relieve yourself from stress until you remove technology from the equation. Try to switch off all the devices and spend some time in the real world, away from problems, clients and all the other things that stress you out. You’ll find yourself unwinding soon after unplugging!

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Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 14

fear1The only thing normally holding many people back—and away from their dreams—is themselves. They suffer from terrible fears when they try to better their lives. Inner fears like frustration, failure and lack of confidence allow some to be talked out of success by their own demons. These fears control the lives of many people but can be conquered.

This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to take a look at sociophobia, a crippling fear that can stop you reaching your full potential, and can even stop you from living a normal, everyday life.

Sociophobia is the fear of society or people. People with this phobia find it hard to even have or maintain friendships.

The origin of the word socio is Latin (meaning interpersonal relationships) and phobia is Greek (meaning fear). Sociophobia is considered to be a social phobia, which is discussed on the home page. Sociophobia is also known as anthropophobia and related to phobanthropy, which is a morbid dread of being around other people and of human society in general.

Recognizing Your Phobia

The symptoms of sociophobia can vary greatly by person depending on their level of fear. The symptoms typically include extreme anxiety, dread and anything associated with panic such as shortness of breath, rapid breathing, irregular heartbeat, excessive sweating, nausea, dry mouth, nausea, inability to articulate words or sentences, dry mouth and shaking. If you are finding you’re sweating with an increased heartbeat when in the presence of people, you may well be suffering from sociophobia.

Overcoming Your Phobia

Recognizing Negative Thoughts

The first step is to identify the automatic negative thoughts that underlie your fear of social situations. For example, if you’re worried about an upcoming work presentation, the underlying negative thought might be: “I’m going to blow it. Everyone will think I’m completely incompetent.”

Challenge Everything!

It helps to ask yourself questions about the negative thoughts: “Do I know for sure that I’m going to blow the presentation?” or “Even if I’m nervous, will people necessarily think I’m incompetent?” Through this logical evaluation of your negative thoughts, you can gradually replace them with more realistic and positive ways of looking at social situations that trigger your anxiety.

Feel No Fear

It can be incredibly frightening to think about why you feel and think the way you do about social situations, but understanding the reasons for your anxieties will help lessen their negative impact on your life.

Look Around You!

In order to reduce self-focus, pay attention to what is happening around you, rather than monitoring yourself or focusing on symptoms of anxiety in your body. Try looking at those around you, the sky, trees, plants or anything else that is going on in your vicinity. Focus on the world at large.

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David Bowie Dies at 69! A Legacy Lesson for All! Princess of Suburbia Chimes In!

David Bowie Dies at 69! A Legacy Lesson for All! Princess of Suburbia, Dr. Princess Fumi Hancock, Chimes In!

David-Bowie_Chicago_2002-08-08_photoby_Adam-Bielawski-croppedI woke up to the sad news of David Bowie…Dies at 69! Understanding how his family may be feeling as I had just lost a brother barely 6 days ago, my first inclination was to find out what legacy he left behind. While many may be stuck on how he died, I have a different view about it. I shared this on my periscope broadcast today (CLICK HERE).

Many who follow me on periscope (@PrincessinSub) and BLABTV (www.blab.im/PrincessinSub) know how passionate I am on the importance of writing our Legacy Statement and allowing that legacy statement to point us to our true calling or passion or life purpose, as you may call it. David Bowie exemplified that.

photo by_Adam-Bielawski

Here is why:
(1). Every media outlet I turned to this morning said one great thing about his legacy: that he was “a master re-inventor and a compassionate business man.” This is a legacy his family should be incredibly proud of. It was amazing that not many talked about how much he made but more on the lives he impacted while he was with us. This is a legacy worth celebrating for generations to come.
(2). Another media outlet talked about the fact that he was someone who tried things and when it didn’t work, he knew when to let go, then re-invent his life purpose. Because he was great at it, his music cut across generations. While many artists in his generation may have faded away, he remained known. He was also a family man, who kept his family as private as he could.
(3). Once he re-engineered his life purpose, he worked at it. As a matter of fact, David Bowe’s last music was released last week, few days before he turned 69.

Here is a question for you today, if you took your last breath today, what would your legacy be?

Live Life Full, Leave It Empty

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Dr. Princess Fumi Hancock, DNP, MA, BSN
Your Vision Midwife, Lifestyle Entrepreneur
Radio/TV Host
https://www.periscope.tv/Princessinsub
https://katch.me/PrincessinSub/
OFFICIAL WEBSITE:
www.theprincessofsuburbia.com

 

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